Quit and Rest: Why these are not "4 letter words"

 As a type A recovering perfectionist, "rest" wasn't always in my vocabulary. If I wasn't moving or doing something "productive," I was asleep. In my 20s I used to have every moment of my day scheduled and I was always on the go. I was living in New York City at the time and bought roller blades so that I could get around the city faster. I was dancing, practicing yoga, and teaching swimming, so clearly wasn't active enough... I always felt a stigma around resting or quitting something, being seen as lazy or not good enough in some way. Someone who quit did so because they weren't "good enough" to continue, and someone who rested was "lazy."

Neither of these things are actually true, but these were my deeply held beliefs for much of my teen years and early adult life.

Why Quit and Rest aren't actually bad words

One cannot "do all the things" unless rest happens. Rest can mean sleep, but it can also mean non-doing. I remember at Summer camp we always had "siesta" after lunch. You didn't have to sleep but you had to rest. You could write letters home (long before email was invented), read, draw, anything quiet and relatively still that you could do on your bunk. Rest is something that relieves you from all the doing. Maybe it's reading a book or journaling. Maybe it's painting, drawing, or knitting. It's something that requires little physical or mental effort, and nourishes or replenishes you in some way. Napping is also fine if you require more sleep. 

The word "Quit" tends to have a negative connotation. In our production-centric society, quitting tends to mean giving up, failing, losing in some way. What if, instead, we reframed quitting as taking a pause? The pause could be temporary or permanent, it doesn't matter; there is no failure or judgement in pausing. We relieve ourselves of the judgement that comes with "failure" or "giving up." Quitting something, no matter how permanent, might be exactly what we need. Maybe we just quit for the day and start again tomorrow, maybe we quit forever. They both deserve the same amount of of non-judgement, if we are quitting for our physical and mental health..

Notice your self talk when you choose to Quit or Rest

When life feels difficult, stressful, and overwhelming, that's the perfect time to quit and rest. What happens in your mind when you stop moving and step off the crazy treadmill? Do you judge yourself for being weak or not being able to handle whatever it is that has you at your breaking point? Do you compare yourself to others who seemingly can do it all? Notice these thoughts and ask yourself are they actually true. (I'll give you a hint: they usually are not). Somewhere along the way you (like I) picked up these beliefs that resting is weakness and quitting is failure. I'm here to tell you it's bullshit. 

We are human beings; we have feelings and limited resources of energy that don't last forever without refueling. If you go-go-go until you drop, you are slowly using up your reserves; it's much harder to bounce back when those reserves are gone. Living on sugar, caffeine, and adrenaline can only last you so long, and leaves you feeling like garbage warmed over.

Prioritize sleep and rest. Put your work down every evening and let it go until the next day. If you have a high pressure, high stakes job, give yourself permission to turn off your body and mind, even for just 10 minutes each day. Put down your cell phone and close your laptop. Breathe, practice a restorative type of yoga, meditate, draw, paint. These are activities that give your body and mind a chance to restore and replenish those valuable energy stores that allow us keep doing "all of the things." 

We only have one life; we deserve to feel good while living it.